The Traditional Empire of Empinion is a colossal, cultured nation, notable for its parental licensing program, punitive income tax rates, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, devout population of 3.273 billion Empinionians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Law & Order, and Education. The average income tax rate is 73.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Empinionian economy, worth 263 trillion kronor a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Basket Weaving, Cheese Exports, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 80,488 kronor, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.8 times as much as the poorest.

The armed forces are locked in an expensive and bloody war abroad to stamp out possible terrorists, 'The Anti-Government Hour' is a popular programme on many of Empinion's radio stations, the sun rises an hour later on border communities, and player-submitted issues are printed just so they can be burned by [violet] (Empinion has found 2 easter eggs). Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Empinion's national animal is the turtle, which can occasionally be seen avoiding garbage in the nation's murky oceans.

Empinion is ranked 160,075^th in the world and 2^nd in The Angularis for Largest Publishing Industry, scoring 1,549.86 on the Bella Potter Productivity e-Index.