The Despotic Dictatorship of Despoticania is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by The Despot with an iron fist, and remarkable for its keen interest in outer space, frequent executions, and aversion to nipples. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 38.665 billion Despoticanians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The medium-sized, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Despoticania Prime. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Despoticanian economy, worth an astonishing 48,063 trillion Despollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 1,243,069 Despollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government has become increasingly militant, tech-mad citizens think that the laser-powered bread-slicer uPhone App is the coolest thing since sliced bread, the government decides its policies by observing the flight of birds, and first-time moms are expected to be experienced parents from day one. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Despoticania's national animal is the Winged Unicorn Pig, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Church of Transcendental Hatred.

Despoticania is ranked 294,295^th in the world and 54^th in The Alliance of Dictators for Nicest Citizens, with 0.04 average smiles per day.