The United Gooberate of Cridland is a mammoth, cultured nation, ruled by Cleetus Corncob with an iron fist, and renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, smutty television, and compulsory military service. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 7.712 billion Cridlandians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Administration, Education, and Law & Order are also considered important, while International Aid receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Gooberville. The average income tax rate is 74.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Cridlandian economy, worth a remarkable 1,263 trillion Peanuts a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Soda Sales, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 163,843 Peanuts, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

Shelters struggle to keep up with the endless intake of stray animals, the men in trenchcoats hanging around playgrounds are actually police officers, the police insist that racism does not exist, and Cleetus Corncob has killer fashion sense. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cridland's national animal is the Goober, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Cridland is ranked 316,926^th in the world and 16^th in Magna Aurea for Safest, scoring 7.14 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.