The Ultramarine Colony of Cananea is a mammoth, efficient nation, ruled by Queen Dido of Carthage with a fair hand, and notable for its pith helmet sales, irreverence towards religion, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 8.33 billion Phoenicians live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The minute, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government, or what there is of one, juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Byblos. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 4.8%.

The powerhouse Canaanite economy, worth 683 trillion Shēkels a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Pizza Delivery industry, with major contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Gambling, and Cheese Exports. Average income is 82,069 Shēkels, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 250,214 per year while the poor average 20,881, a ratio of 12.0 to 1.

Busy commuters no longer hear the cries of "I want some more!" on the nation's streets, hordes of tourists are ruining the environment, political speeches always take place at sunset to a background of patriotic power ballads, and the government only announces the deaths of its members when it's convenient. Crime, especially youth-related, is a major problem, probably because of the absence of a police force. Cananea's national animal is the Phoenix, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Canaanite Polytheism.

Cananea is ranked 661^st in the world and 1^st in The Equator for Highest Drug Use, scoring 416.99 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.