The Completely Failed State of Angbhand is a titanic, efficient nation, ruled by Endymion with an iron fist, and remarkable for its avowedly heterosexual populace, compulsory vegetarianism, and zero percent divorce rate. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 20.225 billion Angbhandians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government is dominated by the Department of Defense, although Industry, Education, and Administration are also considered important, while Welfare and Social Policy receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sylvania. The average income tax rate is 98.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Angbhandian economy, worth an astonishing 16,923 trillion dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Retail, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 836,736 dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Candlelit dinners are less romantic with a flickering LED, stony-faced prosecutors play loud gangster rap music during court proceedings, dozens of additional foreign policy specialists have been sent to the country's WA Mission, and future forecasters fearfully discuss grey goo and human obsolescence. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Angbhand's national animal is the worg, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Angbhand is ranked 2,602^nd in the world and 15^th in the Plains of Perdition for Smartest Citizens, with 177.69 quips per hour.