The Dictatorship of Woeful Crows is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its compulsory military service, restrictive gun laws, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 2.263 billion Woeful Crowsians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 21.9%.

The Woeful Crowsian economy, worth 127 trillion Gold Pieces a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Gambling. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 56,508 Gold Pieces, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.1 times as much as the poorest.

Overhead luggage compartments on planes sometimes conceal diminutive intelligence officers, Leader is plotting to coup the Pacific (Woeful Crows has found 1 easter egg), Leader has been nicknamed 'Robomop', and terrified tympanists are finding themselves on the front lines armed only with kettledrums. Crime, especially youth-related, is almost non-existent, thanks to a capable police force. Woeful Crows's national animal is the Crow, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Woeful Crows is ranked 144,594^th in the world and 12^th in The Grey Wardens for Safest, scoring 62.36 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.