The Bar on the corner of every regionBoard

Great Libertona wrote:

Managed to activate a random coordinated portal device, causing it to teleport myself on the top of the sturdy bar table.

*Tried to activate the device again, but it ran out of energy.*

Ah well, I'll just get some juices. Hey bartender! May I order bottles of uranium?

You can order whatever you want, you probably aren’t going to get anything, the service here is worse than McDonald’s drive through

Passes while skiing then disappears through the door at the back

Brocklandia wrote:

Aren't you gonna be surprised when you see the penguins and dogs loitering somewhere around here. They're probably lying in wait to munch on you. Say ... Have you gone into that dark and scary storeroom at the end of the hall lately?

Plus, these zombies only eat dead people, not alive people.

Maple Hockey Canadia wrote:

You can order whatever you want, you probably aren’t going to get anything, the service here is worse than McDonald’s drive through

Yeah, but at least you can throw your food and drinks back at the servers in the McDonald's drive-through window without incurring criminal charges. If you throw our food at someone, it's attempted murder. Now, which sounds more fun?--Food-covered servers rolling their eyes at you, or extended prison time with a cellmate named Killer?

I send a coke to all!

The Georgeian Empire wrote:

Rumble rumble rumble
Engines quietly hum
Reverberating throughout the ship
As it moves speedily on
Until it reaches a star
The airlock hisses, I prepare to step
but then I trip,
and I tumble tumble tumble

Woof!

Maple Hockey Canadia wrote:

Though I will say that Killer was a great roommate, nice lady. She made me a friendship bracelet and everything.

I thought the arresting officer was the one who gave you that bracelet?

Brocklandia wrote:

As often as customers we shove into the meat locker seem to find their way out, "alive" versus "not alive" seems a mutable condition.

The "not alive" become "re-alive".

Brocklandia wrote:

I thought the arresting officer was the one who gave you that bracelet?

No, eh
Killer made one for me and one for the arresting officer
She also made one for Stabby Joe and Stabby Al but Stabby Al shot Stabby Al and now Stabby Al is dead and Stabby Joe is in solitary for another six years

Maple Hockey Canadia wrote:

No, eh
Killer made one for me and one for the arresting officer
She also made one for Stabby Joe and Stabby Al but Stabby Al shot Stabby Al and now Stabby Al is dead and Stabby Joe is in solitary for another six years

Stabby Al shot hirself? That seems an odd way to frame Stabby Joe.

Brocklandia wrote:

Stabby Al shot hirself? That seems an odd way to frame Stabby Joe.

No Stabby Joe shot Stabby Al, he was trying to frame Shooty-Pants Kevin but everybody knows Kevin’s a stabber not a shooter
Stabby Al tried to shoot Stabby Joe and himself but Stabby Al has bad aim so that didn’t work out too well.
Also, damn this got violent fast

Maple Hockey Canadia wrote:

No Stabby Joe shot Stabby Al, he was trying to frame Shooty-Pants Kevin but everybody knows Kevin’s a stabber not a shooter
Stabby Al tried to shoot Stabby Joe and himself but Stabby Al has bad aim so that didn’t work out too well.
Also, damn this got violent fast

Well, at least it's Shooty-Pants Kevin, and not Banana-Culottes Kevin. That guy is just weird, in addition to his oddball fashion choices.

_{Besides, imagine how embarrassing "was killed by a banana" would be for the surviving heirs. Some family shames stick around for generations.}