The Islamic Republic of Zimardini is a titanic, efficient nation, ruled by Serafeim Stamatis with an iron fist, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, aversion to nipples, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 16.693 billion Zimardinians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Orestiada. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 71.9%.

The all-consuming Zimardinian economy, worth a remarkable 2,306 trillion Dollars a year, is mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, Uranium Mining, and Furniture Restoration. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 138,199 Dollars, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 521,366 per year while the poor average 25,516, a ratio of 20.4 to 1.

Being sent to collections is more dangerous than ever, jaywalkers are condemned to lives of poverty for their heinous crimes, using "inspect element" is grounds for espionage charges, and the country is preparing for war. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Zimardini's national animal is the Giraffe, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Islam.

Zimardini is ranked 11,491^st in the world and 1^st in Equiterra for Most Corrupt Governments, with 144.18 kickbacks per hour.