The Armed Republic of Xonimni is a titanic, safe nation, notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, zero percent divorce rate, and avowedly heterosexual populace. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 24.433 billion Xonimnians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The medium-sized, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Law & Order, and Industry. The average income tax rate is 38.3%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The strong Xonimnian economy, worth a remarkable 1,264 trillion Shiny Green Things a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Automobile Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Retail. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 51,756 Shiny Green Things, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

Paranoid museum guards keep a lookout for any animated displays attempting to escape the premises after dark, glamping Xonimnians won't sleep in a tent that doesn't include a Jacuzzi, the silencing of dissent speaks volumes about the quality of Xonimnian democracy, and prison walls have had to be modified to keep parkour-trained criminals from escaping. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Xonimni's national animal is the Cat, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Xonimni is ranked 127,771^st in the world and 5^th in Cordillera for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector, scoring 1,315.12 on the Pepperoni Propulsion Productivity Index.