The Directorate of Valkalan is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Director Vikko with an even hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, deadly medical pandemics, and labour-free parental leave. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 35.251 billion Valks are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The tiny, corrupt, pro-business government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ravingard. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Valk economy, worth an astonishing 28,050 trillion Syns a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Arms Manufacturing, and Uranium Mining. Average income is a breathtaking 795,747 Syns, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 4,363,565 per year while the poor average 73,900, a ratio of 59.0 to 1.

Citizens are exhausted from weekly general elections, visions of giant pink Orcas are a common side effect after Valks eat their meals, thick smog keeps Valks from looking too far ahead, and calls to prayer are the newest dog whistles. Crime is totally unknown. Valkalan's national animal is the Orca, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to heavy metals seepage into national waterways.

Valkalan is ranked 15,030^th in the world and 1^st in Zarathustra for Largest Black Market, with 280 trillion Standard Monetary Units.