The 3rd Infantry Division of USARMY is a mammoth, safe nation, ruled by General Buford C Blount III with an iron fist, and renowned for its zero percent divorce rate, compulsory military service, and suspicion of poets. The hard-working, cynical population of 6.974 billion Joes are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Fort Benning. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 34.1%.

The USARMYian economy, worth 330 trillion tins of dip a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Uranium Mining industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Automobile Manufacturing, and Retail. Average income is 47,400 tins of dip, with the richest citizens earning 8.4 times as much as the poorest.

Police spend their Saturday nights breaking up illegal street races, USARMY recently hosted the least successful trade negotiations since The Phantom Menace, claiming to have performed the Heimlich Maneuver is a popular defense for assault charges, and arthritic surgeons with tremulous fingers reassure patients that they are in safe hands. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. USARMY's national animal is the M-16, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is The Infantryman's Creed.

USARMY is ranked 266,932^nd in the world and 4^th in USA for Most Cultured, scoring 60 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.