The Black Cat Commander of Universal Wavefunction is a mammoth, safe nation, ruled by Salem Skollvaldr with an even hand, and renowned for its frequent executions and restrictive gun laws. The hard-working population of 5.763 billion Universal Wavefunctionians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Healthcare, and Defense. The average income tax rate is 21.2%.

The Universal Wavefunctionian economy, worth 338 trillion catnips a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Uranium Mining, and Soda Sales. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 58,815 catnips, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.2 times as much as the poorest.

Polygraphs are relegated to the dungeon exhibit in castle museums, children who display even minimal sporting aptitude are immediately assigned a personal trainer, estate agents justify funky smells by revealing how often the previous owners showered, and murderers frequently escape punishment by claiming they were protecting their honour. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Universal Wavefunction's national animal is the black cat, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.

Universal Wavefunction is ranked 215,206^th in the world and 961^st in Artificial Solar System for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 29.11 on the Bus Surprisal Index.