The High Athelingric of Towle is a mammoth, efficient nation, ruled by Asher Wiley with an iron fist, and renowned for its national health service, disturbing lack of elderly people, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 8.879 billion Towleans are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The large, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Osearwynn. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 83.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Towlean economy, worth a remarkable 1,337 trillion pounds a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Tourism. Average income is an impressive 150,631 pounds, with the richest citizens earning 6.5 times as much as the poorest.

Travellers are often forcibly evicted by torch-bearing mobs, Asher Wiley is called 'Patches' at international summits, the might of the entire Towlean Navy is focused on fifty bemused spear-throwing islanders, and belligerent citizens shoot at passing clouds for 'violating their airspace'. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Towle's national animal is the snow leopard, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Adoptionism.

Towle is ranked 41,640^th in the world and 3^rd in Card Gardens for Safest, scoring 105.31 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.