The Tight End of TJ Hockenson is a mammoth, genial nation, notable for its parental licensing program, keen interest in outer space, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, cynical, humorless, devout population of 6.237 billion TJ Hockensonians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Administration. The average income tax rate is 57.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient TJ Hockensonian economy, worth a remarkable 1,106 trillion bronze nickels a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 177,452 bronze nickels, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

Baby dolls thrown in the trash are a leading cause of panic attacks, nobody is allowed to stop the local daycare from reading Nietzsche to pre-schoolers, the most sacred right is the right to ignore the rights of slaves, and travelers are subject to extensive searches if beet stains are visible on their clothing. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. TJ Hockenson's national animal is the rockwarbler, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

TJ Hockenson is ranked 259,553^rd in the world and 2^nd in Minnesota Vikings for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring -6.37 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.