The Free Land of Tintenherz is a gargantuan, efficient nation, renowned for its deadly medical pandemics, parental licensing program, and multi-spousal wedding ceremonies. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 42.779 billion Tintenherzians live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The minute, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government, or what there is of one, is primarily concerned with Education, although Industry, Social Policy, and Healthcare are also considered important, while Spirituality and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Dunkelheit. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 1.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Tintenherzian economy, worth a remarkable 7,776 trillion books a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Soda Sales, Information Technology, and Gambling. Average income is an impressive 181,771 books, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,583,399 per year while the poor average 3,255, a ratio of 486 to 1.

Meat prices are soaring as the farming industry struggle under government-imposed restrictions, the population's jaw muscles put sharks to shame, the newest shade developed by Tintenherz's dye industry has been dubbed 'Agent Orange', and the nation's space program is doxxing the planet. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Tintenherz's national animal is the martin, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Tintenherz is ranked 319,779^th in the world and 13^th in Universal Dream Network for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring -26.08 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.