The Democratic Republic of NameIsCoole is a huge, orderly nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, prohibition of alcohol, and triple-decker prams. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 533 million Cooleans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Velvetshire. The average income tax rate is 22.0%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The strong NameIsCoolean economy, worth 31.2 trillion Cool Pesos a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Door-to-door Insurance Sales industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 58,522 Cool Pesos, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.7 times as much as the poorest.

Guide dogs for the blind have been seen using government websites, home renovation projects take decades to complete, cops in Velvetshire spend much of their time napping on a park bench next to Embassy Row, and public loudspeakers constantly tell citizens they are "happy people". Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. NameIsCoole's national animal is the Eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

NameIsCoole is ranked 76,774^th in the world and 692^nd in Europe for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 50.99 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.