The Ancient Land of The Hittite Empire is a titanic, efficient nation, ruled by Suppiluliuma I with an iron fist, and notable for its museums and concert halls, frequent executions, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 18.435 billion Hittites are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Industry, and Education also on the agenda. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Hattusa. The average income tax rate is 94.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Hittite economy, worth a remarkable 3,432 trillion bronze coins a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is broadly diversified, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 186,201 bronze coins, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Scrabble champions have been left scrambling for scraps, Hittites are shown the peaceful ways of free trade by force, all that glitters is Suppiluliuma I's toilet, and being Suppiluliuma I has been voted one of the top ten most dangerous jobs. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Hittite Empire's national animal is the Chimera, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Hittite Polytheism.

The Hittite Empire is ranked 161,000^th in the world and 12^th in Greater Brutesia for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 744.84 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.