The Commonwealth of Teleria is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Adrien with an even hand, and notable for its smutty television, ubiquitous missile silos, and multi-spousal wedding ceremonies. The compassionate, devout population of 4.141 billion Telerians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kaerok Castle. The average income tax rate is 74.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Telerian economy, worth 517 trillion roubles a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 125,087 roubles, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Kaerok Castle has restaurants serving every meat from aardvark to zebra, heretic deviants are free to practice their deviance outside of Teleria, the number of eyes rolled per maths lesson is increasing exponentially, and the nation's streets have become a winter wonderland of salt and sand. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Teleria's national animal is the desert eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is the Sacred Faith.

Teleria is ranked 247,990^th in the world and 3^rd in Gelen for Largest Trout Fishing Sector, scoring -3.69 on the Nemo Depletion Efficiency Index.