The Republic of Svallen is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by President of the Republic Mats Åkerlund with an even hand, and notable for its otherworldly petting zoo, daily referendums, and vat-grown people. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 7.134 billion Svallenneses are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The relatively small, corrupt, pro-business government prioritizes Defense, with Industry, Education, and Administration also on the agenda, while Environment and Welfare aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Söderlund. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 69.3%.

The frighteningly efficient svallenese economy, worth a remarkable 3,631 trillion Svärs a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Retail, Information Technology, and Uranium Mining. Average income is a breathtaking 509,106 Svärs, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,724,736 per year while the poor average 49,813, a ratio of 54.7 to 1.

A firework a day does not in fact keep the doctor away, expats return home to a government devoid of social and environmental agencies, the military has adopted a weird double-fisted salute, and commuter vessels have trouble staying afloat due to increased passengers. Crime is totally unknown. Svallen's national animal is the swallows, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Secularism.

Svallen is ranked 1,982^nd in the world and 14^th in Calme Ybovien for Most Corrupt Governments, with 349.64 kickbacks per hour.