The Republic of Searchlights is a mammoth, socially progressive nation, ruled by Lighthouse Keeper with an even hand, and renowned for its absence of drug laws and suspicion of poets. The hard-working, democratic, devout population of 6.568 billion Searchlightsians enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The relatively small, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Welfare, Spirituality, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Laser Focus. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 8.9%.

The strong Searchlightsian economy, worth 312 trillion Sparklers a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Retail, Uranium Mining, and Cheese Exports. Average income is 47,550 Sparklers, with the richest citizens earning 7.6 times as much as the poorest.

In life full of care there is no time to stop and stare, the only record being broken at sporting events is the highest death toll, little girls are in tears as Lighthouse Keeper confiscates their pink princess ballgowns, and expensive lawyers are hired to defend citizens in court for public urination charges against their pets. Crime is a problem, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Searchlights's national animal is the Firefly, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Let your light so shine that men may see.

Searchlights is ranked 154,118^th in the world and 4^th in True Hydra Empire for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 905.33 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.