The Disputed Territories of Schala is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by Princess with an iron fist, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, parental licensing program, and anti-smoking policies. The compassionate, cynical, cheerful, devout population of 27.388 billion Schalans are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Royal Slave Dungeon. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Enslaved economy, worth an astonishing 11,570 trillion Whips a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism. Average income is an amazing 422,463 Whips, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.6 times as much as the poorest.

Money grows on trees, outdated physical currency is considered a biohazard, contestants on Schala's Got Talent are screened by the government to make sure that they actually have talent, and one-man canoes fitted with the latest tracking technology leave no room for one man. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Schala's national animal is the sparkle pony, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Obedience.

Schala is ranked 12^th in the world and 1^st in The Slave Guilds for Lowest Crime Rates, with 457.91 law-abiding acts per hour.