The Gigachad of Republic Of Noobs is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Holy Cornball with an even hand, and remarkable for its sprawling nuclear power plants, complete lack of prisons, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 4.462 billion Noobs are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Gigachad command centre. The average income tax rate is 69.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Republic Of Noobsian economy, worth 707 trillion Jawlines a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Retail. Black market activity is notable. Average income is an impressive 158,486 Jawlines, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.9 times as much as the poorest.

Competing film industry executives commission movies depicting each other as ugly baby-eating villains, the Counter-Terrorism Unit has been nicknamed "Big Bad Wolf" for its tendency towards urban demolition, the Treasury has been accused of flushing money down the toilet, and people often feel unbalanced by their daily commute. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Republic Of Noobs's national animal is the Sigma male, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Sigmaism.

Republic Of Noobs is ranked 261,398^th in the world and 4,285^th in eta for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring -3.16 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.