The Disputed Territories of Red Guam is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, renowned for its pith helmet sales, suspicion of poets, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, humorless population of 1.442 billion Guamians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The enormous, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Administration, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Fort Arsrick. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 60.3%.

The very strong Guamian economy, worth 86.8 trillion Trench Dollar Second Editions a year, is quite specialized and dominated by the Trout Farming industry, with significant contributions from Pizza Delivery, Retail, and Information Technology. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 60,216 Trench Dollar Second Editions, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 225,055 per year while the poor average 11,284, a ratio of 19.9 to 1.

Guamian doors require a Ph.D. to open, spies caught red-handed are served cocktails on their first-class flights home, heavy industry grinds to a halt as new equipment must be biked in, and children happily laugh and play on their way to school during air-raids. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Red Guam's national animal is the Fruit Dove, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Red Guam is ranked 32,951^st in the world and 7^th in Federated Nation of Western Islands for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring 2,538.43 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.