The Holy Commonwealth of Primeautia is a mammoth, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Beloved Prime with an even hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, frequent executions, and astonishingly minimal parenting. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 7.289 billion primeautians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and look forward to their next free and open election, to be held on an as-yet unannounced date.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Holy Mole Hole City House. The average income tax rate is 66.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient primeautian economy, worth a remarkable 1,138 trillion Prions a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Retail. Black market activity is extensive. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 156,232 Prions, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

Elementary school students are required to master Bach's Chaconne in D before graduation, matryoshka dolls resembling nested Death Stars are commonly sold, advertisements read like science journal articles complete with extensive references, and criminal rehabilitation takes place in re-education centers. Crime is totally unknown. Primeautia's national animal is the tyrannosaurus rex, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Great Almighty Yppah.

Primeautia is ranked 306,050^th in the world and 2^nd in Crowned Reaches for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 22.63 on the Bus Surprisal Index.