The Crimson Node of Node Crimson is a colossal, genial nation, renowned for its zero percent divorce rate, smutty television, and anti-smoking policies. The compassionate, devout population of 4.698 billion Node Crimsonians are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. The average income tax rate is 74.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Node Crimsonian economy, worth 541 trillion Nodecoins a year, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Information Technology, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 115,078 Nodecoins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.1 times as much as the poorest.

The new foreign policy is "why bother invading neighbours when they can be bought wholesale?", the fishing lobby has stemmed the tide of environmental regulations, the nation's faithful often say there is a higher power watching over them, and Node Crimsonians ask their doctors whether chili peppers are right for them. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Node Crimson's national animal is the Circuit, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Node Crimson is ranked 43,089^th in the world and 46^th in The Node for Most Extensive Public Healthcare, scoring 3,407.68 on the Theresa-Nightingale Rating.