The Republic of Nick Woltemade is a huge, cultured nation, notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, public floggings, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 580 million Nick Woltemadeans are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Administration. The average income tax rate is 69.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Nick Woltemadean economy, worth 43.9 trillion Gameses a year, is dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Furniture Restoration, Information Technology, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 75,688 Gameses, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government snoops on private internet connections, grade school teachers mark homework with red "CITATION NEEDED" stamps, saying that someone looks a bit pale can be construed as hate speech, and six-year-old children playing dress-up are viewed with suspicion. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Nick Woltemade's national animal is the Player, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Nick Woltemade is ranked 255,576^th in the world and 1,004^th in Concord for Nicest Citizens, with 6.19 average smiles per day.