The Three Holy Kingdoms of New Mesopelagia is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by The Great Lawgiver with an even hand, and renowned for its anti-smoking policies, national health service, and restrictive gun laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 38.863 billion New Mesopelagians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The tiny, corrupt government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Law & Order is also considered important, while Social Policy and Environment aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Illia. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient New Mesopelagian economy, worth an astonishing 18,084 trillion Meso Dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Information Technology, and Gambling. Black market activity is extensive. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 465,344 Meso Dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.7 times as much as the poorest.

Internet moderator is one of the most popular jobs among the nation's more socially awkward citizens, translators have been hired to deal with the varying regional accents during national political debates, The Great Lawgiver's iHouse is so intelligent that it manages its own social media accounts, and it is common to see Maxémon Trainer listed on New Mesopelagian resumés. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. New Mesopelagia's national animal is the Vesperian, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is The Church of New Mesopelagia.

New Mesopelagia is ranked 287,501^st in the world and 7^th in The Versutian Federation for Most Primitive, scoring -501.37 on the Scary Big Number Scale.