The Dictatorship of Merlance is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Merci with an iron fist, and notable for its ritual sacrifices, national health service, and avowedly heterosexual populace. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 3.113 billion Mercians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order, Education, and Administration are also considered important. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cania. The average income tax rate is 95.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Mercean economy, worth 956 trillion Conchias a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 307,300 Conchias, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Merci's reputation is hard as nails, school lockers are filled with fancy underwear, vacationing Mercians expect to be treated as royalty, and birdsong in the mountains has to be loud enough to drown out nearby jackhammers. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Merlance's national animal is the Dolphin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Mercism.

Merlance is ranked 330,671^st in the world and 7^th in Atrax for Nicest Citizens, with 0.15 average smiles per day.