The Capital City of Luanda is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Bailiff with an iron fist, and remarkable for its infamous sell-swords, keen interest in outer space, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 29.496 billion Luandans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Defense, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Luanda. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 76.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Luandan economy, worth a remarkable 4,344 trillion Kwanzas a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Information Technology, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 147,283 Kwanzas, with the richest citizens earning 5.8 times as much as the poorest.

Hostage-takers offer loyalty scheme points for prompt payment, domestic cruise ships fly the Luandan flag out of fear of being blown up, people who eat pizza with lactase supplements are arrested by the flavour police, and romantic sunsets are no longer interrupted by explosions and monstrous roars. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Luanda's national animal is the Agapornis, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Luanda is ranked 25,678^th in the world and 5^th in Absolution for Most Corrupt Governments, with 89.23 kickbacks per hour.