The Railway Ridden Nation of Lead Keion is a titanic, orderly nation, ruled by Kieran White with an iron fist, and renowned for its teetotalling pirates, enslaved workforce, and hatred of cheese. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 15.361 billion Lead Keionians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Healthcare, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Starthlam. The average income tax rate is 91.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Lead Keionian economy, worth a remarkable 2,980 trillion Keionis a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched black market in Tourism, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 194,018 Keionis, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.6 times as much as the poorest.

Friendly revolutionaries are the nation's greatest export, murder suspects plead the 'there was a rat beneath his chef's hat' defense, optometrists will see citizens in seconds but health inspectors won't be sighted for years, and tightly packed choir-boys sing the god-given joys of heterosexuality on public transport. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Lead Keion's national animal is the Great Western Railway Pannier Tank, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Atheism.

Lead Keion is ranked 331,259^th in the world and 5^th in The Guild for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring -13.51 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.