The Republic of Labavaria is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Librick Sarlakov with an iron fist, and remarkable for its anti-smoking policies, otherworldly petting zoo, and parental licensing program. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 1.385 billion Labavarians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Drinitia. The average income tax rate is 92.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Labavarian economy, worth 212 trillion Markoes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an impressive 153,381 Markoes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Cultural heritage is measured in Scoville Heat Units, the government is plagued with uncertainty, burglars are known for taking cash, socks, and other valuables, and old people living in plastic bubbles complain about a new type of social isolation. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Labavaria's national animal is the Samandrina, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Sarlakovism.

Labavaria is ranked 316,046^th in the world and 15,289^th in Balder for Most Rebellious Youth, scoring -36 on the Stark-Dean Displacement Index.