The Republic of Koochiching is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Edward H Loll with a fair hand, and remarkable for its museums and concert halls, national health service, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 30.792 billion Koochichingians live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The relatively small, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government prioritizes Education, although Welfare, Industry, and Environment are also considered important, while Spirituality and Law & Order are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Wahpeton. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 8.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Koochichingian economy, worth a remarkable 4,019 trillion Pistoles a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Retail, and Tourism. Average income is an impressive 130,528 Pistoles, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 517,471 per year while the poor average 22,241, a ratio of 23.3 to 1.

For just a few extra Pistoles Koochichingians can get new driving records with their new cars, televangelists flaunt their expensive cars when they attend charity events, eminent domain has been abolished, and enemy navies sail within bombardment range of major coastal cities with impunity. Crime is totally unknown. Koochiching's national animal is the Flying Dolphin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Koochiching is ranked 142,575^th in the world and 38^th in Anarchy for Lowest Crime Rates, with 62.67 law-abiding acts per hour.