The Suppressed squirrels of Klopswurst is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by fairy king amne with an iron fist, and renowned for its otherworldly petting zoo, national health service, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 38.226 billion worthless Klopswurstians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The large, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government prioritizes Education, although Environment, Healthcare, and Administration are also considered important, while Spirituality and Defense receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Blutwurst. The average income tax rate is 81.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Klopswurstian economy, worth a remarkable 7,633 trillion golden Klops a year, is highly specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Soda Sales, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 199,689 golden Klops, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Kindergartners' favourite dance move is the stop-drop-and-roll, country folk are sent to obligatory boarding schools to learn how to be civilized, Fairy king amne's Twitcher account is typically used to share Schnitzeltier memes rather than government policy, and Klopswurstian watches list strained wrists as a common side effect. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Klopswurst's national animal is the Schnitzeltier, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is obedience.

Klopswurst is ranked 290,608^th in the world and 84^th in International Democratic Union for Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector, scoring -30.89 on the Henry Ford Productivity Index.