
| Population | 2.968 billion |
| Capital | Route Nineville |
| Leader | The Patroon |
| Currency | Van Buren |
| Animal | Beaver |
The Patroonship of Kinderhook is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by The Patroon with an iron fist, and renowned for its keen interest in outer space, disturbing lack of elderly people, and punitive income tax rates. The cynical, devout population of 2.968 billion Kinderhookians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.
The medium-sized, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Route Nineville. The average income tax rate is 57.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.
The very strong Kinderhookian economy, worth 307 trillion Van Burens a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Woodchip Exports, Tourism, and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 103,669 Van Burens, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.
Families waiting for delayed pipe installations hope daily for rain, the air force's greatness is based on how many enemies are made during procurement, Tetris has been banned for its graphic violent content, and smoking is banned in public areas. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kinderhook's national animal is the Beaver.
Kinderhook is ranked 46,253rd in the world and 3rd in Upstate for Largest Manufacturing Sector, scoring 21,499.55 on the Gooback-Jerbs Productivity Index.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- :
Kinderhook was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Corrupt Governments.
- :
Kinderhook was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry.
- : Following new legislation in
Kinderhook, smoking is banned in public areas.
- : Following new legislation in
Kinderhook, Tetris has been banned for its graphic violent content.
- : Following new legislation in
Kinderhook, the air force's greatness is based on how many enemies are made during procurement.
- : Following new legislation in
Kinderhook, families waiting for delayed pipe installations hope daily for rain.
- : Following new legislation in
Kinderhook, parents dread their examinations more than their children.
- : Following new legislation in
Kinderhook, it is now illegal for teens to view any sites except Club Kitten and My Little Donkey.
- : Following new legislation in
Kinderhook, terrorist videos start by thanking their sponsors.
- : Following new legislation in
Kinderhook, the government is paving paradises to put up parking lots.









