The Capital City of Khartoum is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, notable for its infamous sell-swords, pith helmet sales, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 28.077 billion Khartoumians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Administration. The average income tax rate is 70.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Khartoumian economy, worth a remarkable 3,993 trillion Ponds a year, is mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, Information Technology, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 142,218 Ponds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.3 times as much as the poorest.

Grinding bureaucracy has the international wheels of justice turning slowly, unpopular cops are fired at a moment's notice by the citizens they police, the government spares every expense for national defence, and kindhearted Khartoumians generously pay taxes for citizens of other countries. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Khartoum's national animal is the Camel, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Khartoum is ranked 303,692^nd in the world and 9^th in The Atlantic for Most Cultured, scoring 41 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.