The Huddled Terrified Masses of
Capitalist Paradise

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Now you're in it!

You wanted a libertarian paradise?

The basis of the economy of Keyser Soze isn't very pretty, but very lucrative for a few lucky and enterprising individuals. We pride ourselves on a lack of law and let everyone sort it out themselves. It's not live and let live though, because there's also no one there to protect you from predatory corporations, gangs, and criminals. It's more of a twisted soup of social Darwinism at its worst, which is in essence a libertarian paradise. Obviously, some libertarians, who find themselves getting their throats slit over the disputed ownership of their socks, may quickly find themselves with a different opinion on the merits of living in a libertarian paradise.

What's it like to live in Keyser Soze?

If you have the shiny things and the guns to protect your shiny things, you're doing fine. Sure, you're constantly worried about losing your shiny things or being betrayed by some of those with the guns protecting your shiny things, but that's how it goes when you're on top of the dung heap. For the rest of humanity, it's either learning to be indispensable (non-disposable) or hiding any shiny things you might have that someone else wants. Nobody is going to help you, so you're pretty much screwed if you ever need help and can't pay for it or someone doesn't find you indispensable. Oddly enough, there is a certain amount of the population who find this less than awesome and become refugees to other nation states. Some nation states are less welcoming to refugees from Keyser Soze though, since some of these refugees include the vanguard of organized crime seeking to gain a foothold on new, fertile soil.

What's it like to be a tourist in Keyser Soze?

You're serious? OK. Unless you're here to get mugged, ripped off, or kidnapped, as the basis of a documentary you're making, we're not sure why you're here. You're probably up to no good though, so welcome to the jungle! Most nation states issue "WTF were you thinking advisories" to their citizens, upon finding out they want to travel to Keyser Soze. While we have very low crime rates, the fact that we have no laws should be factored into your destination choice. That hotel, where you wake up in a bathtub full of ice and missing your kidneys, is our five star hotel for tourists. Sure, Keyser Soze is a hell of a good time where anything goes, but it's also a place where anything goes and the locals aren't particularly protective of strangers. The word for stranger in the local language is very close to mark or target, so the hospitality sector could probably use some work.

What kind of culture does Keyser Soze have?

Pop culture is borrowed, stolen, and corrupted to form the basis of culture in Keyser Soze. A lucky few might afford being sent abroad for schooling in the arts or have private tutors, but there aren't a lot of museums and art galleries here. Street graffiti is the highest form of grass roots art in Keyser Soze. This graffiti tends to either be gangs tagging territory or protesting the sad state of their miserable lives. Needless to say that street graffiti artists tend to get shot a lot, since everyone is free to criticize art however they see fit. If you're looking for carelessly stacked foreign art and luxury items, underneath a garish painting of a shirtless warlord riding a horse, while choking out a dragon, look no further than the nearest armed compound.

What kind of economic opportunities are there in Keyser Soze?

Everything and everybody has a price in Keyser Soze. If you were looking for a government job and a pension, this might not be your nation state, since what little government there is is a sham parliament that nobody pays any attention to. It's great place to do business, if you want to get away from government regulations, but don't mind paying for protection. There's no taxation, so nobody will be bothering you, except for the people who want what you have. Cell phones networks are big here, because the country lacks the infrastructure necessary for land lines. Counterfeiting is a huge problem in Keyser Soze; "problem" as defined by corporations getting their stuff counterfeited in Keyser Soze, since the locals couldn't care less. Piracy is also a problem; "problem" as defined by ship and cargo owners unfortunate enough to ply the waters off of our coasts, since piracy is generally good for the domestic economy. This will occasionally result in shelling the coastline operations of pirates by aggressor nation states, "aggressor" as defined by pirates complaining about poor sports out there who can't take a joke or a hijacked freighter for that matter.

What kind of diplomatic relations does Keyser Soze have with its neighbours?

Keyser Soze might be a kleptarchy if anyone was actually running the show, so they make pretty bad neighbours. Their sham parliament occasionally makes proclamations to the world that make people not wonder what drugs that they're on, but what drugs they're not on. The only people who take the government of Keyser Soze less seriously than the people of Keyser Soze are the governments of other nations. Nobody in their right mind would operate an embassy in Keyser Soze, unless it was an armed compound for a regional corporate headquarters. Most diplomacy towards Keyser Soze amounts to the occasional bombing of compounds or shelling of the sea coast, as a friendly reminder of when the criminals have gone too far. A little bribery to people who can make things happen doesn't hurt either. The ineffectiveness of the sham parliament makes other forms of diplomacy futile. Boots on the ground diplomacy is even less indulged in, owing to warlords acquiring and making free use of weapons of mass destruction, often against their own populace. No. That's not pink eye. You should probably have been wearing a gas mask if you wanted to get drunk later or you know anything later. That and accountants whispering in the ears of your government, telling them just what it would cost to clean the place up, how little profit is to be had, and how the people back home would feel about that kind of expense. How soon is that next election or revolution expected at home anyways? Maybe just bomb them and issue a press release about it. Yeah, probably better in the long run, although foreign governments might be tempted just to drop a few nukes on the place just to see if it makes things improve.

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