The Imperial Commonwealth of Holy Lapamato Empire is a titanic, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Emperor Lapamato with a fair hand, and renowned for its state-planned economy, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 18.258 billion Holy Lapamato Imperials are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The medium-sized, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Lapamato City. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Holy Lapamato Imperial economy, worth a remarkable 7,296 trillion megis a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Tourism, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an amazing 399,636 megis, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Treason is relative, student athletes gaze forlornly at abandoned tapewormball fields, pranking is an art form, and if there's something strange in your neighborhood you call Brancaland. Crime is totally unknown. Holy Lapamato Empire's national animal is the tapeworm, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Holy Lapamato Empire is ranked 488^th in the world and 2^nd in Nordic Lands for Most Cultured, scoring 507 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.