The Disputed Territories of Herpoolford is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its compulsory military service, prohibition of alcohol, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 6.706 billion Herpoolfordians are free to succeed or fail in life on their own merits; the successful tend to enjoy an opulent (but moralistic) lifestyle, while the failures can be seen crowding out most jails.

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Defense. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 10.5%.

The all-consuming Herpoolfordian economy, worth 561 trillion euros a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Arms Manufacturing, and Retail. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 83,776 euros, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 498,633 per year while the poor average 6,446, a ratio of 77.3 to 1.

Herpoolford's airwaves are dominated by corporate-backed commercial radio, mining is the nation's most dangerous occupation, relatives of recent award winners find their trophies make stylish urns, and a citizen who thinks a slave is a deadbeat is entitled to make the descriptor literally true. Crime is a major problem, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Herpoolford's national animal is the dolphin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Herpoolford is ranked 234,665^th in the world and 876^th in Jihad Army of the Emperor for Most Primitive, scoring -114.85 on the Scary Big Number Scale.