The Republic of Hellman is a titanic, cultured nation, ruled by Gabriel with an even hand, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, sprawling nuclear power plants, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed population of 18.301 billion Hellmanians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Hellman City. The average income tax rate is 32.2%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Hellmanian economy, worth a remarkable 3,610 trillion Hellmanic Dollar - H$s a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Retail. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 197,267 Hellmanic Dollar - H$s, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

Pranking is an art form, religion makes people horny, the long arm of the law possesses a rather slow hand, and asking 'does my bum look big in this?' leads to 30 hours of self-esteem classes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Hellman's national animal is the bull, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is None.

Hellman is ranked 298,545^th in the world and 14^th in Microsoft 365 for Nicest Citizens, with 0.49 average smiles per day.