The United States of Francis Eagleton is a very large, efficient nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, zero percent divorce rate, and suspicion of poets. The hard-working population of 478 million Francis Eagletonians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The relatively small, pro-business government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Defense, and Education. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 9.9%.

The very strong Francis Eagletonian economy, worth 31.0 trillion Centenniums a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Uranium Mining, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is 64,946 Centenniums, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 219,915 per year while the poor average 14,170, a ratio of 15.5 to 1.

Tampons are used as cheap fishing bobbers, war criminals are given full state funerals, funeral directors are frequently looking at their watches during funerals, and the air force's greatness is based on how many enemies are made during procurement. Crime is moderate, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Francis Eagleton's national animal is the Andromisa, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Francis Eagleton is ranked 80,140^th in the world and 4^th in Centennimisa for Rudest Citizens, with 63.28 insults per minute.