The Card Gardener of EpLeHo is a titanic, efficient nation, ruled by Giovanniland with an even hand, and remarkable for its prohibition of alcohol, suspicion of poets, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, humorless population of 14.114 billion Gardeners are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of World Collection Center. The average income tax rate is 85.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Gardener economy, worth a remarkable 1,945 trillion Cards a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is extensive. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 137,863 Cards, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.6 times as much as the poorest.

Sweat stains are proof of political acumen, pro-life activists often lecture pregnant women undergoing routine prenatal screening, the latest government policy passed by a close shave, and foreign nationals who stumble near EpLeHo are harbingers of war. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. EpLeHo's national animal is the Gardens, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Card Farming.

EpLeHo is ranked 285,588^th in the world and 17^th in Card Gardens for Highest Disposable Incomes, with 19,990.26 Standard Monetary Units.