The Corporatocracy of Elcric Kcalb is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Chairman Adenauer with an iron fist, and remarkable for its parental licensing program, suspicion of poets, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 29.03 billion Kcalbites are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The tiny, corrupt, pro-business, well-organized government prioritizes Law & Order, although Defense and Education are also considered important, while Social Policy and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Gratenburg. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Kcalbite economy, worth an astonishing 10,609 trillion Hobs a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Retail. Average income is an amazing 365,472 Hobs, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,765,852 per year while the poor average 13,576, a ratio of 203 to 1.

Asking 'does my bum look big in this?' leads to 30 hours of self-esteem classes, vegetables are crisper thanks to CRISPR, exports are stamped with "made by the invisible hand you commies", and arguments about toilet seats being left up or down get surprisingly heated. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. Elcric Kcalb's national animal is the Castor Kcalbis, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Secular Humanism.

Elcric Kcalb is ranked 286,037^th in the world and 3^rd in Tyrrhenia for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring -35.21 on the Clooney Contribution Index.