The Republic of Conservative Dixie is a mammoth, cultured nation, ruled by Tom O'Brian with an even hand, and remarkable for its pith helmet sales, frequent executions, and compulsory gun ownership. The hard-nosed, hard-working, devout population of 7.907 billion Conservative Dixieans are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The relatively small, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Gatlinburg. The average income tax rate is 16.4%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Conservative Dixiean economy, worth 826 trillion Dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Trout Farming, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an impressive 104,524 Dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.9 times as much as the poorest.

Schoolchildren must pass a six-month Ethics and Safety Committee Assessment before they are allowed to mix baking soda and vinegar, commercial breaks often lead to nervous breakdowns, murder victims' families receive windfall payouts when the murderers are executed, and being sent to collections is more dangerous than ever. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Conservative Dixie's national animal is the Bassett Hound, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Christianity.

Conservative Dixie is ranked 89,454^th in the world and 2^nd in The New Moderate Alliance for Longest Average Lifespans, with 74.76 years.