The Popsicle Pete Nation of Clench is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Joseph with an iron fist, and renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, suspicion of poets, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 32.094 billion follower of Josephs are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Industry and Healthcare are also considered important, while Social Policy and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Joseph City. The average income tax rate is 98.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Josephic economy, worth an astonishing 33,156 trillion monies a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Average income is a breathtaking 1,033,116 monies, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,983,402 per year while the poor average 283,835, a ratio of 10.5 to 1.

Strange looking men with big red noses are found hiding behind bushes and inside dustbins, police drones follow every suspected Peeping Tom, school uniforms are compulsory, and the police use sound cannons and mortars to deal with loud parties. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Clench's national animal is the viper, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Josephism.

Clench is ranked 213,306^th in the world and 6,156^th in the Rejected Realms for Highest Drug Use, scoring 13.2 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.