The Republic of Cissie is a very large, cultured nation, notable for its compulsory military service and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-working, democratic, devout population of 241 million Cissies are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Administration, and Law & Order. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 8.9%.

The very strong Cissie economy, worth 16.1 trillion coins a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Cheese Exports, Trout Farming, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Average income is 66,820 coins, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 192,517 per year while the poor average 18,417, a ratio of 10.5 to 1.

All major public areas are watched by police surveillance cameras, military spending recently hit a new high, people with hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia faint upon diagnosis, and cotton candy made from genuine cotton cellulose doesn't quite satisfy. Crime, especially youth-related, is almost non-existent. Cissie's national animal is the Hornislav cat, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Cissie is ranked 174,337^th in the world and 6^th in The Graveyard for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 32.13 on the Bus Surprisal Index.