The Republic of CINOCI 09 is a colossal, safe nation, remarkable for its infamous sell-swords, disturbing lack of elderly people, and frequent executions. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 4.692 billion CINOCI 09ians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 36.5%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The large but inefficient CINOCI 09ian economy, worth 219 trillion guilders a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Woodchip Exports, Trout Farming, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 46,746 guilders, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Courses in how to boil water are popular for formerly microwave-reliant CINOCI 09ians, Leader is too busy listening to praise to get any work done, many in CINOCI 09 are born in the purple, and flatulent people are left to die of cancer at the end of hospital waiting lists. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. CINOCI 09's national animal is the sheep, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

CINOCI 09 is ranked 133,280^th in the world and 4^th in Nihil Omnia for Lowest Crime Rates, with 62.66 law-abiding acts per hour.