The Republic of Ceni is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Audrey Goleidas with a fair hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, complete lack of prisons, and hatred of cheese. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 30.089 billion Cenians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Environment, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cenial. The average income tax rate is 99.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Cenian economy, worth a remarkable 4,405 trillion Bewlegis a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity. The industrial sector is solely comprised of the Book Publishing industry. Average income is an impressive 146,422 Bewlegis, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Cenian husbands are dead good at fathering kids, history textbook pages are used as impromptu tissues by distraught students, children gain their first sex education from reading the dictionary, and enemy navies sail within bombardment range of major coastal cities with impunity. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ceni's national animal is the Tir snake, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Ceni is ranked 3,292^nd in the world and 4^th in Sonnel for Most Cultured, scoring 201 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.