The Matriarchy of Catfeine is a huge, socially progressive nation, notable for its ubiquitous missile silos, smutty television, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 590 million Catfeineans hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The relatively small, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cat Café City. The average income tax rate is 17.0%.

The all-consuming Catfeinean economy, worth 58.9 trillion Mocatccino Moniezzes a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Furniture Restoration, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is 99,854 Mocatccino Moniezzes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.0 times as much as the poorest.

The government thinks Catfeineans can achieve social cohesion by drinking soda together, people find it hard to relate to soldiers because of the dehumanising masks they wear, "Darwin's Disease" is a growing cause of death, and the stratosphere is full of "silent but deadly" attacks from Leader's rear echelons. Crime is totally unknown. Catfeine's national animal is the Cat on 1 gram of Caffeine, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Catfeine is ranked 27,019^th in the world and 378^th in the South Pacific for Most Rebellious Youth, scoring 1 on the Stark-Dean Displacement Index.