The Lands of Cardenao is a mammoth, cultured nation, ruled by Everyone with an iron fist, and notable for its free-roaming dinosaurs, compulsory military service, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 9.709 billion Cardenaoans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government is dominated by the Department of Defense, although Education, Law & Order, and Administration are also considered important, while Spirituality is ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Cardonia. The average income tax rate is 71.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Cardenaoan economy, worth a remarkable 1,535 trillion Marks a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Information Technology, and Retail. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 158,190 Marks, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.6 times as much as the poorest.

Earthquake sirens are a leading cause of hearing loss, there's a lot of mouth-breathers about these days, things are looking up for patients accidentally prescribed erectile dysfunction medication, and a surprising number of travelers carry their water in vodka bottles. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cardenao's national animal is the Squirrel, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Mihalyism.

Cardenao is ranked 303,260^th in the world and 24^th in Arrosia for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 22.94 on the Bus Surprisal Index.