The High Athelingric of Cainitium is a mammoth, orderly nation, ruled by Asher Wiley with an iron fist, and remarkable for its parental licensing program, punitive income tax rates, and suspicion of poets. The compassionate, cynical, humorless, devout population of 7.708 billion Cainitiumians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Osearwynn. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 72.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Cainitiumian economy, worth a remarkable 1,139 trillion pounds a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 147,839 pounds, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 489,625 per year while the poor average 33,343, a ratio of 14.7 to 1.

It's widely agreed that to tennis players love means nothing, old people living in plastic bubbles complain about a new type of social isolation, the contraband cigarette trade is lighting up across Cainitium, and boys are shocked by the revolutionary lesson that women are actually human. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cainitium's national animal is the snow leopard, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Adoptionism.

Cainitium is ranked 282,499^th in the world and 1,101^st in Cainitium for Lowest Overall Tax Burden, scoring -93.14 on the Hayek Index.